Green Lantern is a Peach

In brightest day, or the dead of night
I type this stuff with deadlines tight
Even though I'd rather go fly a kite
The Side is here! Round one! Fight!

Its Sunday, June 26, 2011, and let's do this thing.

MOVIE REVIEW REVIEW?

GREEN LANTERN hit the big screen last week or something like that. You may have noticed that there's been no review for it on here. The reason being that I've been too busy to go get to the movies. I probably could have tried to eek out some time to go see it, but I honestly wasn't over excited about it. I like Ryan Reynolds, and that had me tempted early on, but the more I saw of previews for it, the less excited I got. I didn't like the inclusion of the whole stupid Parallax thing. The special effects didn't excite. I don't like Hal Jordan. This all pretty much led to me giving this one a pass.

What I have found interesting is the reaction to this movie. The critics pretty much all didn't like it. One said it lacked realism. I'm trying to figure out where realism fits into a movie in which a guy gets a magic ring from a space alien. That's kind of a stupid statement. I think THOR let us all know that the whole realism in a superhero flick is way over rated. I just saw Richard Roeper refer to Green Lantern as one of the "sillier superheroes" with his green tights and flitting around. Yeah, because that's so much sillier that a guy in red and blue tights swinging through New York. Its superheroes. There's going to be a certain level of suspension of disbelief involved going in. Then there's people who have said that Hal Jordan was the least likable character in the movie, so at least we know they're staying true to the comics.

There's been other critiques of the movie about some of the acting, some story elements, and dialogue. Having not seen the movie I can't really comment about all that.

The people I've talked to about the movie who have seen it pretty much all said it was alright. Maybe a renter. I'll likely check it out once it hits Netflix.

One thing I find completely hilarious is people being glad this has flopped because that'll free Reynolds up to do a Deadpool movie. Seriously. There was people actually upset that Reynolds signed on to play Green Lantern because in there minds that meant that there was no way he could play Deadpool. Maybe it was because the characters were owned by two different companies. I guess they didn't think about Chris Evans who played Johnny Storm (Marvel), then a character in THE LOSERS (DC), some schmuck in SCOTT PILGRIM VERSUS THE WORLD (Oni Press), and is next going to play Captain America (Marvel again). So its silly to think that just because Reynolds played Green Lantern that he could play Deadpool again. Instead there's an entirely different reason that Reynolds won't play Deadpool again:

THERE WILL NEVER, EVER, EVER BE A DEADPOOL MOVIE!!!!


Oscar mike golf, you ridiculous fanboys!! Do you really think the people over at the Marvel movie branch are sitting there saying "OK, we've got THE AVENGERS well under way. Right after that we really need to jump on this whole Deadpool thing." They're not saying that. They'll never say that. His appearance in X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE? That's what you get. That's all you get. The little bit after the credits? Be grateful. Cherish that. That's the end of Deadpool being on the big screen. If you all say your prayers and eat your vitamins and collectively cash in all your geek karma and maybe, maybe, he might pop up in one of the X-MEN: FIRST CLASS sequels they're planning. Don't get your hopes up. And if you're ready to ask me about the people who were excited about a possible Deadpool movie after the end of the Wolverine movie, I've got news for you. You're it. You and maybe some of your friends. There's no public outcry for this. There's not even an outcry in the comic book reading community. Yes, the character has a rabid fanbase. So, did SCOTT PILGRIM and we saw how well that movie did. Its never going to happen. Get over it and move on.

MUSIC!!!

I hat ninjas. I am a ninja hater. That does not mean that I hate in stealthy ways. I even hate that stupid game where people try to smack each others hands, not only because its stupid, but because its called "ninja". And one big reason is that those pricks will steal your peaches given half a chance. Stupid ninja jerks.



That my dealio for today. I'm going to try to relax and not think about Green Lantern or ninjas. Or worse: Green lantern Ninjas. I actually just made myself shudder with that one. See y'all Wednesday. Weather permitting.

6 comments:

Paul said...

I liked Green Lantern, but it might not be a good movie. I enjoyed it and I think you will too. It is a little silly, but it is fun with a sense of adventure.

Funny enough, I have been singing Peaches all week. Are you in my brain agin?

Marty Nozz said...

I'll definitely check it out once it hits Netflix. It looks fun, but I don't have the time or scratch to get out there to see it.

The Peaches tune is pretty much the response to during by a peach stand on Saturday.

Linda Butler said...

I thought it was better than I originally expected, but I'm glad it's failing because Geoff Johns needs to learn that despite what 50,000 sicksad nerds think, he is NOT a good storyteller.

Spoilers: The movie makes a plot point around dead dads and bomber jackets. Yes, it's definitely a Johns movie.

There is no point in the movie where something can be shown that it's not told instead, and although the action picks up whenever he actually uses the ring to DO things, there's not enough of that going on and so much of what IS done with the rings could have been so much more creative.

Marty Nozz said...

Did Johns get a writing credit on this thing?

Linda Butler said...

Yes, and I believe he was also listed as a Producer.

Marty Nozz said...

That certainly saves me some money. I'm out. Might Netflix it when it comes out, but I'm in no hurry.