The Universe's Name is "Ralph"

Ohm on the range! Its Sunday, April 3, 2011, the reports that Lady Gaga died are false because i started them, and this is The Side. I did manage to fool a person or two for about second with that one. Still, Nathan Fillion trumped me with his breaking news that CASTLE was getting canceled.

Let it be known. You can never top Nathan Fillion.

COSMIC NOZZ!!!

Somehow that stupid book "The Secret" made its way into the Nozz Compound. The Missus has read me a few choice passages from that book, and my brain managed not to explode. Yes, this is the same book that Oprah was raving about a while back. So here's the secret: if you think about something hard enough it'll happen. Congratulation, now you don't have to buy the book. Of course it goes on about the law of attraction and even tries to slip a bit of quantum physics in there to try to make it sound legit, but its pretty much malarky.

Let's wrap our heads around what they're trying to get at. They say by thinking about something you can change things. OK, now let's look at reality. Reality is everything that exists in space and the events that occur through time. Perception of reality is how we take in and interpret reality through our senses. Reality can be changed by actions. And action is an event. Thinking is an event. However, not all actions can change things that actually exist. This is where the book falls apart.

There is a lot of theoretical physics that claim the simply perceiving something can alter it. OK, its starting to get a bit tricky here, but we're not talking about everyday occurrences that can change lives, unless you are a certain cat.

Basically this book is trying to give you Jedi powers through positive thought. Now, I believe in positive thinking, and if you speak your goals, that'll help you stay in the right frame of mind to achieve them. But I can't bend reality to my will through my thoughts. If that were the case I'd be out fighting crime with my new superpowers right now. Still, I've seen people accomplish a lot through strength of will. People with strong, positive attitudes have been shown to recover quicker from illnesses and injuries. The will to succeed has driven champions. Often fights are won before the first technique is thrown.

But there is a certain chain to things. The future isn't hard to predict when its obvious, and some folks just seem to see the pattern to things better than others. Is it luck or some kind of cosmic taoist hoodoo? Is luck cosmic taoist hoodoo? I'm no mystic, but I've seen some weird stuff. I used to buy lotto tickets for the bartenders and waitresses at the bar I worked at, and I'd get one for myself. After making my run to the store I was told there was a call for me from "Ralph" who had some numbers for me. I have no clue who Ralph is or was. I made a mental note of the numbers, but didn't buy a lotto ticket. There were only five numbers anyhow and it was time for my shift on the door. The next morning I checked the lotto numbers and guess what five numbers came up. That's right, and the sixth number was 6. So it seemed I had a mysterious benefactor who could predict lottery numbers, but I never heard from him again. So that chance was pissed away. Upon returning to the bar to work the following weekend I asked the bartender about the mysterious caller. She had no clue who it was. I told her the numbers that they had given me had come up. She asked if i thought it may have been God on the phone. I told her if it was God he'd likely have a better alias than "Ralph".

True story, and like I said weird. But that's how life works sometimes. Things can be predicted logically, but some other times things just come together. Take this post for instance. That book made its way into the house at about the same time I bought a Marvel comic for the first time in sixteen years. What does one have to do with the other?

The Marvel Boycott is a story for another time, and had run its course. The reason I still wasn't buying Marvel was because they weren't putting out anything that made me want to buy their books. But with everything going on with the Fantastic Four, Linda and Richard both urged me to give FF #1 a shot, and I did. I didn't review it on here, because I didn't like it, and didn't feel the desire to do one of my "I'm reading this so you don't have to; save your money" bits. But then that Secret book got into the house, and raised a few discussions about things, and that brought me back to FF #1 and Reed's discussion with Franklin about a video game and his advice to look for the pattern in the programming. Which is immediately followed by Reed being told what he needs to do by two characters that know what the future holds. Essentially, Reed gets a cheat guide thrust upon him.

Life is programmed. It follows set rules. We know a lot of these rules because of science. We've seen how things have operated because of history. Life on this planet continues to advance and change, bringing us to knew and different levels of play. There are things we can't predict, like how life has "programmed" those people and things we interact with. We can't really change the life program. We can see the pattern and try to navigate it more effectively, but we can't break the hard rules. I know this because I can't fly under my own power. Pesky gravity.

But there are ways to make things better for you. State your goals, and not on some piece of paper or a word document or a resumé. Say them. Get up in the morning and say them plainly, and mean it. That gets your head on straight. It focuses you. That's half the battle right there. Do it for the daily goals ("I'm going to clean the house") and the long term ("I'm going to write a novel"). I'm not saying shout it every morning from the front porch, but when you get up to start that morning pot of coffee or before you sit down to check your e-mail and see what the weather is going to be, say it and mean it. You'll be surprised by the results.

So no Jedi powers here. These very well may be the droids you're looking for. However, I gots me some taoist, cosmic mojo workin'. So look out, Loretta.

MUSIC!!!

Two songs today, because one thing can't synchronize with itself.



Parker Lewis proved that synchronize thing using Swatches. That guy couldn't lose.



That's it for today. I'm going to go state my goals and be shift my consciousness two days into the future where all this has already happened and I was great at it. See y'all Wednesday.