Batman's Long Form Birth Certificate is FAKE!!

Yeah, that's right. Its Friday, April 29, 2011, its all about the little blue pill, and this is The Side. My Yahoo account got hacked, and my e-mail sent out a bunch of advertisements for Viagra. I got a bunch of e-mails like this as well so it seems like it was a pretty decent sized hack. Oh well, considering what it could have been sending out I probably got off light.

It the news, people are getting married. So now the drones that just drool over royal stuffs will have a new girl to get weird over. I remember when Princess Diana died and people were saying she was the greatest humanitarian in the world. Meanwhile, and without much fanfare Mother Theresa passed away a couple of days earlier.

In other news, Obama finally released his long form birth certificate, which he should have done when the Clintons asked for it back during the campaign. Some people are irked that this is the an invasion of the Pop-Star-in-Chief's privacy, but the document that he had released was one that would say he's from Hawaii if he had been adopted into the country. I know this because my short form birth certificate lists my adoptive parents as my parents with no mention of my biological parents. The document released is an obvious forgery, as while ol Barry was indeed born in Hawaii, his real middle name is actually "Jeb".


Kicking things off with BATMAN INCORPORATED #5. This book is getting better and better with every issue. The spy game is in full effect with a distinctive super twist. Batwoman's case leads her to team up with British Superspy The Hood and that leads them directly into Batman and Gaucho's path. Big team up, big action, and a ton of utter coolness. Morrison does a great job with Batwoman, and the interaction between her and Bruce is a joy. The old Bruce would have been a prick about her wearing a Bat, but the new and improved Bruce accepts completely in the field and works great with her. Her reaction to learning he's the original Batman was such a nice touch. Kate Kane is such a fun character when handled by talented writers. As for this Hood fella, I ain't so sure about him. Sure, he's all smooth and British, but he fell for the old "I've got an orbiting death ray aimed at you" bit. Tsk. The Leviathan case grows deeper, and we also get to see the Batman of Africa! This book is packed!

Big milestone this week as ACTION COMICS #900 hit the stands. Superman returns to actually doing something in the conclusion of "The Black Ring" epic. Cornell really brought it home balancing out big action with all the really great character moments that have made his run a real treat. This issue also ties into the whole Doomsday crossover that's been going on. I haven't been following it, but I wasn't lost either, so its all good. The issue is 96 pages with a bunch of back ups, but the Cornell story is the best among them. Paul Dini has an interesting little story in there as well. Geoff Johns gave Gary Frank an excuse to draw the Legion of Super-Heroes hanging out in Clark and Lois's place. There was a depressing story about the spaceship the brought Superman to Earth being constructed. Then there's David Goyer's story about Superman going to iran for the protests, and letting us all know that he's officially renouncing his American citizenship. First off, Superman is not an American citizen, Clark Kent is. Second, the bit about the American Way not being enough anymore: real classy, Goyer. So sad to see the douchebag Superman from the JMS SUPERMAN run being carried over. So the book is worth getting if you've been following the awesome Lex Luthor epic, but the back-up stories (aside from Dini's) are skippable.

RED ROBIN #22 dropped me into the middle of a crossover I didn't know was going on. Seems the religious fanatics behind Azrael are planning on destroying Gotham led by a very powerful Meta-human, The Crusader. Dick Grayson, Tim Drake, and Selina kyle are all being tested on personal levels to see if Gotham is worthy of being spared. I didn't care much for this issue. Freddie Williams II has never been an artist that I've cared for, but to his credit this issue is some of his better work. Its seems that even though Tim Drake is a great guy and does nothing but good by the people around him, the nutbag Crusader sees him as unworthy because he's not religious. I hate characters like this because there's some people out there that think most Christians think this way, so I'm hoping he gets a serious comeuppance. Wasn't a terrible issue, but I wasn't into it.

Finishing on a strong note DETECTIVE COMICS #876 in the start of a new case, and artist, Jock, returns to the title. There's a murder with Tony Zucco's daughter in the middle of it. I'd normally feel that this is a bit weak in having Dick Grayson have to help the daughter of the man who killed his parents, but (and this is a big but) it plays out incredibly well in a scene of Dick and Jim Gordon in which Jim talks about his son returning. So much has been going on with this and its the huge elephant in the room. So the question is front and center: how far can an apple fall from a tree? Well paced and well written stuff here. Scott Snyder sinks a great hook in this new mystery that reaffirms my view that this is one of the best written comics going today. Loved it.


What's sad is that after listening to this beautiful song on YouTube I was informed that Lady Gaga was next. Never before had I clicked away from YouTube so quickly.

That's it for today. Lots of Karate stuff on tap for me tomorrow, and I'll see y'all Sunday. Just remember: if you are watching the royal wedding, somewhere out there, I'm pointing and laughing at you.

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