People expect things from you. You expect things from others. You expect things from life. It's a pretty natural thing. Hurricanes are a natural thing too, and like expectations, can lead to disaster.
I'm seeing way too much praise being heaped upon those who are not worthy of it. I criticism condemned as being 'mean spirited'. I work with children. If they want praise they earn it. If they don't meet the standards set they do not advance. I push them. I yell at them. I make them sweat. Their complaints of "that's not fair" are met with laughter. They learn many things from me and the other instructors: if you work, you will progress.
I see this attitude lacking in other aspects of existence. Writers and artists assume that they'll make it big in the comics industry because their friends/family/teachers told them they were good. I've seen dozens of children claim their goal is to go to Japan and draw manga, none of whom have have the ability or work ethic to make that happen. They expect this to happen. It is not their goal. If it was a goal, they'd be working harder.
I'm working on limiting my expectations. Too often I've over-expected only to be disappointed. I like to under promise and over deliver. This is what I must do with my expectations. Do not expect great things, and you'll be surprised by how much greatness you find. This is not disregarding standards. Crap is still crap. You are not special just for showing up. Mediocrity will still be bypassed on my way to superior.
That last line sounds very elitist. I am not an elitist, I am an exceptionalist. I wish to see all things rise to be the best they can be, or at least make the attempt. It's the American Dream. Work hard and do your best and good things will come to you as you earn them.
Unfortunately, that dream is dying. People expect success. They expect praise. They expect a nice house/car/job. They don't want spend hours perfecting their art/craft/trade. They don't want to work at McDonalds while going to school. They don't want swing a hammer all day work of their comics when they get home. They don't want to have to pay their bills.
There are a lot of lazy bastards out there muddying the waters and screwing things up for those who would do their best to succeed. The slackers should just fall by the wayside, but we must be fair. We have to be accepting. We have to help those who aren't as 'lucky' as those who have busted their asses to get what they have.
So for everyone who is expecting something great to happen to you; those waiting for that big break or bail out or helping hand to make your life exactly like you expect it to be: you're all worthless. I know this because i was exactly like you. I was constantly told how smart I was. I was such a great artist. I was such a talented writer. I was stupid enough to listen to it. Then I wised up and got a second opinion from someone who didn't care about me whatsoever. I learned that I had a lot of hard work ahead of me if I wanted to get anywhere.
So, I've got my goals.
I've dumped any expectations about getting a happily ever after.
If I want one, I'll have to build it myself.
Are you building yours?
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